I always found one person who I could trust with all my stuff, someone to help me when I needed to be a human at work. You have to be extremely selective when choosing the person who will become your confidant, and they need to earn it. If you choose incorrectly, you can get burned or have your personal information exposed. It is important to keep your relationship private, otherwise your team will confuse the relationship with their boss playing favourites.
My “secret” friend would help me get out of a meeting if I just needed a moment to compose myself. I once received a devastating phone call while I was at work, one of my best friends had passed away suddenly. My secret friend at the time managed to peel me off the floor, wipe the mascara off of my cheeks and get me into a cab with all of my things before anyone saw me or knew what had happened. I will be forever grateful to this person and what they did for me on that day.
Outside of the office, I learned to have mentors and to engage with them often. My mentors helped me navigate through some tough situations both at work and in my personal life. So, if you are a person in a leadership role, keep this in mind to help you manage the pressure when you are having human feelings in the office. Find yourself a private getaway spot for times when you have reached your mental, physical and emotional limit. The key is to remove yourself, count to 100 (twice), and take a few moments to compose yourself in the privacy of your own single stall washroom. Carefully find your friend who will cover for you, so you won’t have to explain or defend yourself in your most vulnerable moments at the office. Find your mentors, this is huge.
Thank you so much for being here!